February 18, 2009
I have to wonder...does our body act weird because we are paying attention, or do we notice it because we are paying attention.
I thought my cycle was ALWAYS exactly the same. AF would come every 30-32 days, and would come with a vengence. My boobs would hurt for 3-5 days before she showed as a nice little warning sign that she was coming, and then would be gone, just as fast as she came. One thing TTC has taught me...my cycle NEVER seems to be the same.
This past cycle is no exception, and I do think it is the weirdest cycle yet. My temp went down this morning, so I was like ok...here we go, here comes AF, I need to go to work prepared. "Supplies" ...... check ..... Tylonel in case the cramps get to be too much ..... check ..... granny panties (come on admit it...we all have those special pairs of underware that hide at the back of our drawer, until they are taken out once a month because they have been dog eared as our AF panties) ..... check. All ready to go...prepared for the worst.
So today, I have had mild cramping...(very mild in comparison to what I usually get) I went to go pee one time at work, and I had spotting...spotting...at the beginning...no open the flood gates, here comes the waves...but spotting. Weird...then I noticed...wait a minute...my boobs don't even hurt, and they haven't for the last few days...DOUBLE WEIRD This has definately been the weirdest month of my cycles ever...
So I am forced to wonder...has it always been like that, or has paying close attention to my body scared it into acting weird??? LOL....
Hope all is well with you!!
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
February 17th, 2009
I know it's been a while since I blogged..so this may be a long entry.
So the last I think was my Dr. appointment. The rest of the week was fairly uneventful. Nothing happened on Thursday or Friday. My husband was out of town Thursday night, and so I made popcorn shrimp and perogies for supper. My husband only eats fresh pickerel for fish, or fish sticks, so it was a good day to have it, since I know he won't eat it. Man was it good. :) I have been wanting it again, and maybe will buy some for reserve for when I have friends over or something that will eat sea food. :)
Friday I had a cousin's birthday party, that was fun...even though I was still on call...by the way, have I mentioned that I have been on call since January 30th? It's been a long hall...hopefully they hire someone for that other position so that they can help with the phone...I'm not really up fot this 24 hour a day thing. :)
Saturday was Valentines day. I got a dozen pink roses, and a large Toblerone Candy...flowers and chocolate...does my husband know me or what. :) I got him Nascar 2009 for the Xbox...I know him too...and I made a wonderful lasogna. But man, now I know why I have never made it before...what a hassle. LOL...I made it right from scratch...Make the meat sauce...simmer for 45 minutes...make the layers...cook for another 45 - 60 minutes...I started making supper at 3 and we ate at 6:30. LOL...it's hilarious...but it was well worth it...for once a year. :) I also made the red lobster biscuits...you can bet I'll be making them again!!! :) YUMMY!!
Sunday and Monday (because Monday was a holiday here) were totally slack days. I went and saw Paul Blart Mall Cop with a couple of friends...I thought it was really funny, and the rest of the time, I hung out with my husband...:) It was a nice long weekend.....
Now getting back to the TTC stuff...I'm sure AF is gonna start any day now...with all the did I O...did I not O stuff...I'm pretty sure we missed the window...I just wish she would hurry up and get here already. I want to move on to next cycle...I want to try again. :) She is just trying to frustrate me...unfortunately...she seems to be winning on most days. :) But I wonder...how long I should wait till she shows...I mean there is that one percent chance...but nah...I couldn't be...this is the argument I have every day...LOL...I will probably wait till next week...or the weekend...the weekend will make it my longest period ever, so I will test then...as far as I know, I have no symptoms...except the ones where I seem to be making myself feel sick in the afternoon's and evenings again, which is weird cause mornings are fine...kind defeats the purpose of calling it morning sickness don't you think??
Talk to you soon!!
I know it's been a while since I blogged..so this may be a long entry.
So the last I think was my Dr. appointment. The rest of the week was fairly uneventful. Nothing happened on Thursday or Friday. My husband was out of town Thursday night, and so I made popcorn shrimp and perogies for supper. My husband only eats fresh pickerel for fish, or fish sticks, so it was a good day to have it, since I know he won't eat it. Man was it good. :) I have been wanting it again, and maybe will buy some for reserve for when I have friends over or something that will eat sea food. :)
Friday I had a cousin's birthday party, that was fun...even though I was still on call...by the way, have I mentioned that I have been on call since January 30th? It's been a long hall...hopefully they hire someone for that other position so that they can help with the phone...I'm not really up fot this 24 hour a day thing. :)
Saturday was Valentines day. I got a dozen pink roses, and a large Toblerone Candy...flowers and chocolate...does my husband know me or what. :) I got him Nascar 2009 for the Xbox...I know him too...and I made a wonderful lasogna. But man, now I know why I have never made it before...what a hassle. LOL...I made it right from scratch...Make the meat sauce...simmer for 45 minutes...make the layers...cook for another 45 - 60 minutes...I started making supper at 3 and we ate at 6:30. LOL...it's hilarious...but it was well worth it...for once a year. :) I also made the red lobster biscuits...you can bet I'll be making them again!!! :) YUMMY!!
Sunday and Monday (because Monday was a holiday here) were totally slack days. I went and saw Paul Blart Mall Cop with a couple of friends...I thought it was really funny, and the rest of the time, I hung out with my husband...:) It was a nice long weekend.....
Now getting back to the TTC stuff...I'm sure AF is gonna start any day now...with all the did I O...did I not O stuff...I'm pretty sure we missed the window...I just wish she would hurry up and get here already. I want to move on to next cycle...I want to try again. :) She is just trying to frustrate me...unfortunately...she seems to be winning on most days. :) But I wonder...how long I should wait till she shows...I mean there is that one percent chance...but nah...I couldn't be...this is the argument I have every day...LOL...I will probably wait till next week...or the weekend...the weekend will make it my longest period ever, so I will test then...as far as I know, I have no symptoms...except the ones where I seem to be making myself feel sick in the afternoon's and evenings again, which is weird cause mornings are fine...kind defeats the purpose of calling it morning sickness don't you think??
Talk to you soon!!
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
February 11, 2009
Strangly enough...I'm starting to feel better....
I had my Dr. appointment today. He looked at my info, asked me some questions, and refered me to a fertility clinic here in the city. I guess here in Canada we are lucky, because lots of this stuff is covered through our provincial medical system. I feel better that things are starting to get going. DH is taking a sample in on Tuesday, so that will be done. The down side is that it takes a few months to get into the clinic. The positive side, is it will give me more time to temp and figure out what the heck my body is up to. I'm buying OPK's off line, and buying a BBT instead of a regular thermometer. Steps have been taken to try and figure out my problem. He did mention that it may be that I need Clomid to force myself to ovulate. I know that I have seen other girls here on it, and I am going to have to stock some journals and things to see how it works, and if it seems to work. Still hoping and praying that this month was a fluke, and next month I will O. :)
I guess I never thought when I first started TTC and I had a cycle, and it was semi regular that all I have to do is nail down the timeing...I never thought that there could be something wrong with me...and then the small idea of not Oing...which is necessary for making a baby, I was devestated...totally crushed. Like lots of people, I am sure, one of your biggest dreams was to be a mom. To feel like I was having that dream taken away from me...I'm not going to lie...I tend to go to the worst possible ever scenerio right off the bat. I guess if i go worst case scenario, and then it turns out NOT to be wrost case scenario, then I'm not as sad, and even kinda happy and releived...and I guess that's what happened today. I have been up and down and up and down...cross hairs...no cross hairs...I'm glad I had my appointment, because now I just feel like such a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I have the girls at JM to thank for helping me through the hard time...
I need to go to bed now, but pleaes keep me in your T and P as there is a long wait, and hopefully I can get in soon....
Strangly enough...I'm starting to feel better....
I had my Dr. appointment today. He looked at my info, asked me some questions, and refered me to a fertility clinic here in the city. I guess here in Canada we are lucky, because lots of this stuff is covered through our provincial medical system. I feel better that things are starting to get going. DH is taking a sample in on Tuesday, so that will be done. The down side is that it takes a few months to get into the clinic. The positive side, is it will give me more time to temp and figure out what the heck my body is up to. I'm buying OPK's off line, and buying a BBT instead of a regular thermometer. Steps have been taken to try and figure out my problem. He did mention that it may be that I need Clomid to force myself to ovulate. I know that I have seen other girls here on it, and I am going to have to stock some journals and things to see how it works, and if it seems to work. Still hoping and praying that this month was a fluke, and next month I will O. :)
I guess I never thought when I first started TTC and I had a cycle, and it was semi regular that all I have to do is nail down the timeing...I never thought that there could be something wrong with me...and then the small idea of not Oing...which is necessary for making a baby, I was devestated...totally crushed. Like lots of people, I am sure, one of your biggest dreams was to be a mom. To feel like I was having that dream taken away from me...I'm not going to lie...I tend to go to the worst possible ever scenerio right off the bat. I guess if i go worst case scenario, and then it turns out NOT to be wrost case scenario, then I'm not as sad, and even kinda happy and releived...and I guess that's what happened today. I have been up and down and up and down...cross hairs...no cross hairs...I'm glad I had my appointment, because now I just feel like such a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I have the girls at JM to thank for helping me through the hard time...
I need to go to bed now, but pleaes keep me in your T and P as there is a long wait, and hopefully I can get in soon....
Monday, February 9, 2009
February 9, 2009
Well I am anticipating a couple of things...
#1 - tomorrow morning's temp. This morning when I put my temp in on fertility friend (it was a little lower than yesterday morning, and fertility friend changed my O date. I'm not only 3 DPO...confusing. I'm worried that if my temp does not go up tomorrow morning, that it was a fluke temp, and FF is going to take away my cross hairs...the only hope that I have that I even O'd.
#2 - My doctors appointment. I have an appointment that I made for Wednesday, and as happy as I am to find some answers, I'm also very scared. I know that it is a good thing that I am going to the dr, and I will get some of the answers that I need, but there is always that fear of what those answers are goign to be...you think the worst, and then worry about it actually being the worst. It's kinda a catch 22. The good thing is, if I don't ovulate all the time, then there are medications you can take for that. Although, if I do usually O this late, I think I have missed my O almost every time, because like lots of people just starting out, I thought I O'd by the book.
The promotion thing, I'm not sure if I am going to take. I am still deciding on whether or not I will apply for it. There are some situations with some of the guys at my work, that I'm not sure I want to be the front "man" for. I am weighing the pros and cons, and will go from there. They haven't posted to job yet, so I do still have some time to think about it.
That's it for today...I am making Manicotti on Saturday for Vday, so I will post the receipe and pictures on Sunday...it's a good receipe, and I think it's really good. :)
Well I am anticipating a couple of things...
#1 - tomorrow morning's temp. This morning when I put my temp in on fertility friend (it was a little lower than yesterday morning, and fertility friend changed my O date. I'm not only 3 DPO...confusing. I'm worried that if my temp does not go up tomorrow morning, that it was a fluke temp, and FF is going to take away my cross hairs...the only hope that I have that I even O'd.
#2 - My doctors appointment. I have an appointment that I made for Wednesday, and as happy as I am to find some answers, I'm also very scared. I know that it is a good thing that I am going to the dr, and I will get some of the answers that I need, but there is always that fear of what those answers are goign to be...you think the worst, and then worry about it actually being the worst. It's kinda a catch 22. The good thing is, if I don't ovulate all the time, then there are medications you can take for that. Although, if I do usually O this late, I think I have missed my O almost every time, because like lots of people just starting out, I thought I O'd by the book.
The promotion thing, I'm not sure if I am going to take. I am still deciding on whether or not I will apply for it. There are some situations with some of the guys at my work, that I'm not sure I want to be the front "man" for. I am weighing the pros and cons, and will go from there. They haven't posted to job yet, so I do still have some time to think about it.
That's it for today...I am making Manicotti on Saturday for Vday, so I will post the receipe and pictures on Sunday...it's a good receipe, and I think it's really good. :)
Sunday, February 8, 2009
February 8, 2008
So FF told me today that I actually O'd 4 days ago?? It's so weird because if I did O, then wouldn't I be dried up, and I'm not....
I'm still keeping my appointment with the dr...and I'm gonna get checked out cause something just doesn't seem right...It just seems weird that nothing seems to be going the way it should...you know the textbook way. Hopefully the dr. will have some answers for me, and I will be able to keep TTC next cycle...even if it is with medical help.
So FF told me today that I actually O'd 4 days ago?? It's so weird because if I did O, then wouldn't I be dried up, and I'm not....
I'm still keeping my appointment with the dr...and I'm gonna get checked out cause something just doesn't seem right...It just seems weird that nothing seems to be going the way it should...you know the textbook way. Hopefully the dr. will have some answers for me, and I will be able to keep TTC next cycle...even if it is with medical help.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
February 4, 2009
Instead of starting with TTC, I'm going to go right to my other news...My boss at my work got the other job. So he will be moving positions! It's exciting and scary all at once. I will be applying for his position, but am very nervous about it. I have learned so much from him since he came back from sick leave, that I don't really want him to change positions, but I am excited about the opportunity for advancement at my work. I was talking to another one of the guys that works with us, and he said that he thinks that I would be the best canditate to take over his position, so we will wait and see what happens. I just hope I have the right answers and stuff when it comes time for interviews and stuff.
Anyway, as far as TTC goes, nothing has changed. My temp is exactly the same as it was yesterday, so no rise yet...I am getting kinda scared, cause they say that the eggie needs 4-10 days for implantation, and most of my cycles are 30 days long (my last one was longer, but that's not the norm, and it usually isn't longer for two months in a row) Mind you, doesn't everyone always say, TTC will definately make your body to the out of the ordinary. And you will have tons of firsts once you start TTC. I wonder though if your body really has all these firsts, or we just notice them more because we are paying attention? Anyway, back to the topic, my worry is that with needing 4 - 10 days for implantation, and me already at CD 20...is there time for the eggie to implant? Just a thought! I think I only have one person reading my blog...LOL...so I hope you are enjoying it.
Marci
Instead of starting with TTC, I'm going to go right to my other news...My boss at my work got the other job. So he will be moving positions! It's exciting and scary all at once. I will be applying for his position, but am very nervous about it. I have learned so much from him since he came back from sick leave, that I don't really want him to change positions, but I am excited about the opportunity for advancement at my work. I was talking to another one of the guys that works with us, and he said that he thinks that I would be the best canditate to take over his position, so we will wait and see what happens. I just hope I have the right answers and stuff when it comes time for interviews and stuff.
Anyway, as far as TTC goes, nothing has changed. My temp is exactly the same as it was yesterday, so no rise yet...I am getting kinda scared, cause they say that the eggie needs 4-10 days for implantation, and most of my cycles are 30 days long (my last one was longer, but that's not the norm, and it usually isn't longer for two months in a row) Mind you, doesn't everyone always say, TTC will definately make your body to the out of the ordinary. And you will have tons of firsts once you start TTC. I wonder though if your body really has all these firsts, or we just notice them more because we are paying attention? Anyway, back to the topic, my worry is that with needing 4 - 10 days for implantation, and me already at CD 20...is there time for the eggie to implant? Just a thought! I think I only have one person reading my blog...LOL...so I hope you are enjoying it.
Marci
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
February 3, 2009
Ok...so I'm really trying to be positive...I really am...but it is not easy. :( I guess mostly, I'm mad at myself. I guess that I wish that I had known about all this temping and checking CM and stuff before like back when we first started TTC. Or at least in September when we first moved into the house, and found out that things just weren't working. I am trying not to be mad at myself. I assumed everything will be ok. I just assumed that it would just happen for me. Anyway, enought about that...I'm being positive. :)
I don't know if there is anyone that actually reads this blog, but if there is...and if you live in Canada, do you know where you can find OPK. I can only find two different kinds at Walmart...both of which are almost $40.00, and that only comes with 7 tests. When I tried using them this cycle...I didn't get a for sure +. It got really close, but the test line was never as dark or darker than the line that is already there. So I'm pretty sure I missed the actual surge, cause it went back down slowly to the stark white OPK. Also I am looking for a BBT thermometer. I again looked at Walmart, and couldn't find anything.
On the plus side...I may be getting a different job at work. My boss has applied for a job that someone had retired from at the end of December. So his job will be open. I'm going to apply for it, but I haven't been there very long, so I don't know if I will get it, but I guess I will just have to wait and see. The weather has warmed up, so work is not nearly as busy as it was about a month ago. It's nice to have a bit of a break.
That's it for today...tomorrow is HUMP Day!!! YIPPEE!!!
Ok...so I'm really trying to be positive...I really am...but it is not easy. :( I guess mostly, I'm mad at myself. I guess that I wish that I had known about all this temping and checking CM and stuff before like back when we first started TTC. Or at least in September when we first moved into the house, and found out that things just weren't working. I am trying not to be mad at myself. I assumed everything will be ok. I just assumed that it would just happen for me. Anyway, enought about that...I'm being positive. :)
I don't know if there is anyone that actually reads this blog, but if there is...and if you live in Canada, do you know where you can find OPK. I can only find two different kinds at Walmart...both of which are almost $40.00, and that only comes with 7 tests. When I tried using them this cycle...I didn't get a for sure +. It got really close, but the test line was never as dark or darker than the line that is already there. So I'm pretty sure I missed the actual surge, cause it went back down slowly to the stark white OPK. Also I am looking for a BBT thermometer. I again looked at Walmart, and couldn't find anything.
On the plus side...I may be getting a different job at work. My boss has applied for a job that someone had retired from at the end of December. So his job will be open. I'm going to apply for it, but I haven't been there very long, so I don't know if I will get it, but I guess I will just have to wait and see. The weather has warmed up, so work is not nearly as busy as it was about a month ago. It's nice to have a bit of a break.
That's it for today...tomorrow is HUMP Day!!! YIPPEE!!!
Monday, February 2, 2009
February 2, 2009
So...I definately know now from my experience this month, I have a very short LH surge...if I have one at all. I'm really worried at this point that I don't Ovulate. I look at everyones charts, and they have this very nice big temperature rise...and me...I am going up by .1 each day for the last two days!! It's really scary to me to think that I don't ovulate...because that's definately necessary in order to make a baby, and it makes me feel kinda silly that I have been trying so hard all this time, for no apparent reason. I am going to wait till AF comes, and then I am going to go talk to my dr...take a copy of my chart if I can, and see what he thinks...I mean I did get pretty dark in the OPK, but didn't get as dark or darker than the test strip, and today we are back to the almost none existant line. :(
Other than that, my day today was fine. DH is sick, which sucks, but hopefully he will feel better soon. Got to go for now.
So...I definately know now from my experience this month, I have a very short LH surge...if I have one at all. I'm really worried at this point that I don't Ovulate. I look at everyones charts, and they have this very nice big temperature rise...and me...I am going up by .1 each day for the last two days!! It's really scary to me to think that I don't ovulate...because that's definately necessary in order to make a baby, and it makes me feel kinda silly that I have been trying so hard all this time, for no apparent reason. I am going to wait till AF comes, and then I am going to go talk to my dr...take a copy of my chart if I can, and see what he thinks...I mean I did get pretty dark in the OPK, but didn't get as dark or darker than the test strip, and today we are back to the almost none existant line. :(
Other than that, my day today was fine. DH is sick, which sucks, but hopefully he will feel better soon. Got to go for now.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
First Blog Entry
February 1, 2009
First blog entry. I have never been a blogger before...in fact, the word blogger is kinda funny...is that what it's called? Anyway, I have decided to try blogging to try to get my mind off of TTC...although, chances are...most things posted in this blog will be about TTC.
Let me start at the beginning for those of you that may not know me. My name is Marci, and I am 30 years old. My husband's name is Kelly and he is turning 32 at the end of the month. We had dated for almost 4 years by the time we got married, which we did on March 29, 2008. Coming up on our one year anniversary.
We started TTC slightly before the wedding, mind you, at the time we were living with his uncle, so that made it difficult definately. On September 1, 2008 we finally got our own house, and of course have been trying even harder now at TTC. I love our cute little house, and I love that we have our own place, and I love that we are TTC...what I don't love is that we are being unsuccessful. :( I guess you are caught up.
This is my first cycle that I have been pulling out all the stops. OPK's, Temping, checking CM...and some things that I have discovered I like, while others...not so much. :( I am worried now that I don't O, and of course, I will know in a couple of days, but the OPK's that I chose, were not very successful for me. I will continue to test I guess until my temp jumps up, but I am not expecting to see a surge...so we will see. DH and I had BMS this morning, and I'm going to try to get him again this evening, just in case I do O or have O'd or want to O I guess. I will keep you updated...(as long as I can figure out how to get back here!! :)
First blog entry. I have never been a blogger before...in fact, the word blogger is kinda funny...is that what it's called? Anyway, I have decided to try blogging to try to get my mind off of TTC...although, chances are...most things posted in this blog will be about TTC.
Let me start at the beginning for those of you that may not know me. My name is Marci, and I am 30 years old. My husband's name is Kelly and he is turning 32 at the end of the month. We had dated for almost 4 years by the time we got married, which we did on March 29, 2008. Coming up on our one year anniversary.
We started TTC slightly before the wedding, mind you, at the time we were living with his uncle, so that made it difficult definately. On September 1, 2008 we finally got our own house, and of course have been trying even harder now at TTC. I love our cute little house, and I love that we have our own place, and I love that we are TTC...what I don't love is that we are being unsuccessful. :( I guess you are caught up.
This is my first cycle that I have been pulling out all the stops. OPK's, Temping, checking CM...and some things that I have discovered I like, while others...not so much. :( I am worried now that I don't O, and of course, I will know in a couple of days, but the OPK's that I chose, were not very successful for me. I will continue to test I guess until my temp jumps up, but I am not expecting to see a surge...so we will see. DH and I had BMS this morning, and I'm going to try to get him again this evening, just in case I do O or have O'd or want to O I guess. I will keep you updated...(as long as I can figure out how to get back here!! :)
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